dance and life

interesting last salsa lesson.

went with tj and yun, joined by 2 indian girls (one of whom turned out to be yun's coursemate. the world is that small) so tj was the only guy, naturally all the attention was on him. so i was dancing with him... he was trying his best to lead. but guess i was impatient, never wait for him to lead then i just move. so end up pele (the instructor) made some comments, which were very interesting and very true as well.

all in all, she said tt girls shdn't be too impatient, guys take time to learn how to lead properly, so if the guy doesn't lead tt well, and makes you do the same few steps over and over again, just let him... maybe can guide him, never scold/comment on him on the dance floor, do all the discussions off the dance floor... if really have to comment, dun say "how come u never do xxx dance move?" but say more diplomatic things like "if u pushed my hand this way i would be able to read ur moves more accurately"

it was v interesting cos this was EXACTLY wat happened when tj and i went union, cos he was unsure abt moves then we didn't end up dancing alot, and i was impatient cos i wanted to boogie abit. but he wanted to confirm each and every step first, while i just wanted to go with the flow. needless to say, it didn't end up very well...

so it got me thinking: since i was able to allow myself to be led by the zai dancers (e.g. the dance instructors), how come i can't let myself be led by tj? does tt translate to real life? i.e. is it because i dunno wat i really want, so i'm just waiting for the guy to take the lead, to do wat he wants and hopefully know wat i want as well? and when he sometimes fumbles then i turn impatient? are all girls like that or am i alone in this? then tj started telling me tt sometimes he's afraid sometimes tt i dun really know wat i want, and tt i'm settling for something 2nd best.

i beg to differ. i accept him for who he is and who he wants to be. and i know tt there's something in him tt has the potential to be great, it's just tt he hasn't discovered it yet. and yes, he fumbles sometimes, but i do too... if girls just want someone who already has wat they want, and know wat they want etc. then they shd just marry old successful men who have tons of money to get them wat they want... but no we don't do tt... cos there has to be something more, something special...

so yes, i'm still grappling with my place in this world, finding my way, and i know you are too. so take my hand and we'll make this journey much more enjoyable. and take heart to know tt i'll always be behind you.